I hate her

I hate her so much, yet love her so much... Though I am so angry with her, with her crazy and unreasonable behaviour, I get so worried for her... I don't know what I am doing too sometimes... I feel so controlled by her... She really is too much oftentimes...

She wanted to have some stupid surprise for me at the MRT though we said to meet at BK. I was late, due to the tuition, and she threw such a bloody fit of anger... I know she is angry, as would anyone else, so i kept on trying to coax her. But she just doesn't know when to stop. From the MRT all the way to home... And bloody hell, just before reaching the block, she blew up just cause I said that I'll punish myself by eating later for being late earlier. She's bloody crazy. But I still approached her after that before entering the lift. At home, at the dinner table, I was quietly eating, as I was still rather pissed off... Fuck... I don't want to say anymore.

She just wants her way, wants me to do what she wants, wants me to shower her with care and concern though she can just beat me and do whatever she wants... WTF!!! And I feel so controlled as I don't want her to do anything stupid that hurts herself, and I don't want her doing stupid drastic things... Shit... I don't know what to do at times... She fucking hell beats me all the fucking time... I didn't leave all I have to get bitten and beaten by her all the time, while up till date I've never even slapped her or anything even close. And talking about slap, she slapped me again today. Damn. I even bloody kow towed to her... She wanted me to beg her. What a asshole...