The Space In Between

You know the times, when you wake up in the morning and stare blankly into the ceiling, and wonder, "What should I do today?" That's basically my life. Real fun. Life's like a neverending cycle of contradictions. Waiting in earnest for exams to be over, only to dread the boredom of having nothing to do in the holidays. Perhaps its just me, but I bet i'm not the only one. I have to admit that there are things to do, people to meet, games to play, movies to watch, books to read. But always, something missing. Even in the company of friends, the lingering feeling is always there, like a phantom stalking me, ready to pounce at me the moment the fun and laughter stops. That's the emptiness I feel, which seems to paint my surroundings grey and dull, bleak and inanimate. Emptiness, the place in between, a place where no one else can enter, that time just seems to stand still......

Tuesday, February 08, 2005

The Wait....

After I spoke on the phone with Pearl earlier, she smsed me:


Pearl: hee ya i put alarm already...u dont need give me morning call leh i joking only..or else u keep yawning during reunion dinner hehe...anyway u sleep soon too k now i already lying on bed...think some things then fall asleep;>

Me: Hmmm... This past week i can't seem to sleep properly anyway... So just might have woken up by then. Don't think too much k? =)

Pearl: oh ya forgot to tell u th i dreamt of u two days ago...hehe u got dream of me before?

Me: Erm... Lets just say too many times liao... -_-" ... Its one of the reasons why i hate to dream... cause when its good, i wake up and realise its a dream... when its bad... erm... lets just say its bad...

Pearl: then have u been thinking abt our thing till cant sleep well?...

Me: Erm... Actually, there is a reason for everything... Have you wondered why I haven't been sleeping well this whole past week? I wake up at 7 or 8 though i sleep at 4 or 5, not by alarm clock, but automatically...

Pearl: then is the reason th i said correct or is there other reason?...

Me: Sigh... There is only one reason... And you already said it... You know ah, to compose real sad poetry requires a lot of intense emotions...

Pearl: I have been thinking abt our thing too...i will get back to u asps k... i also wan to know the ans myself...but im afraid to rush too much...but i wouldnt delay as well...really...

Me: I know what you are going through... That's why I'm just trying to stop my feelings for the time being... Playing computer games is one of those ways....



What a day....

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