Someone...

Its 6am here, and I can't sleep... My one and only pleasure in life... But I can't complain, since I've been sleeping since 8pm yesterday, exclusive of the afternoon nap I had. All I can do is to wonder in amazement how people actually manage to sleep for 14++ hours at a go... It just totally amazes me... Bastards...

Anyway, woohoo! Its already 22 hours and she hasn't replied me! WOW!!! (dripping with sarcasm) As they say, love is blind.... Why in the world do I even like her? 如何して？ Ok, apart from the obvious that she is pretty, which isn't really a consideration since I didn't bother with her when I first knew her, what could be the reason(s)? She isn't really smart, and can't hold any intellectual debate with me, but yet, her simplemindedness is a draw in itself. She makes everything seem so new and interesting, like something just discovered -- the excitement of finding out something new. From her little acts, it is also apparent that she is a very thoughtful person, (all except a particular one, relating to contactability), buying gifts for those around her, sparing a thought for others. Like the one time she broke her slipper, and could have just gotten into the back seat of the car which was so much more convenient, but still hobbled to the passenger seat -- I was driving. Similar to me, though cheery on the outside, she has a deeper self, a loner character, which when related to me, sounded so much like myself. Though we have different interests , we share quite a few, such as watching dramas, movies, enjoying beautiful scenery, talking about everything under the sun...

Why then do I even think so much? Just the curse of the intellectual but emotional person. My mind tells me one thing, that maybe the sms didn't reach her, or that she is sick, or something else, but my heart tells me another, that she dislikes me, that she can't be bothered. Good thing no one else will know who I am =) Under no circumstances would I ever reveal these thoughts to others if they knew me... I'm starting to love this... writing under anonymity... Anyway, time flies through the darkest hour, and hopefully, this will pass soon.... As I read in a Chinese book:

"思念通常只有一个方向。因为你思念的人，未必会思念你呀!"

Sigh... How true that is... Why torment myself? Why not let fate take its course? If it is meant to be, it is meant to be... Why inflict pain on myself, in the secret places of my heart?

People are irrational, emotional creatures.

I totally agree.